A LOVE LETTER TO THE MOM IN US ALL

In this week’s INSIGHTS for Healing by Design, I’d love to share my thoughts with you as we lead up to Mother’s Day.

Lately, I’ve been reflecting on what it really means to be a Mother, especially given I was never a Mom to human children.

The idea of Motherhood, for me, has never fit neatly inside the lines of how I’ve been conditioned to view it; birthing and raising children.

I’ve never experienced that IDENTITY nor felt it needed to be my adopted definition for being a women. 

And truthfully, I once felt “less than” because I hadn’t birthed children. But during my decade of peri-menopause, I expanded the idea of Motherhood as being a way that still gives me value with my maternal instincts but pushes way past the walls of birthing and raising children.

I’ve Mothered through my work as a medical practitioner for 24+ years.

~ Through the way I show up for my patients every day.

~ Through the fierce protection I feel when a woman tells me she’s been dismissed or overlooked by others, or told her mental and physical pain is “just in her head” or “just part of getting older.”

~ Through the conversations full of empathy I have when I know a fellow woman is simply trying to hold it all together, and no one’s noticed how bone-tired she really feels.

~ Through the concentrated listening when that woman says, “I don’t feel like myself anymore,” and she needs someone to finally believe her and understand what’s really happening.

Isn’t this Mothering too?

I’ve come to realize that being a Mother is less about having children or even just biology and more about cultivating presence with others and helping them elevate their lives with empathetic support.

It’s a way to love. 

A way to hold space for another. 

A way to be that soft space to place your sore feet in a world that often demands too much, too often, from us all.

I fully embrace this Mothering, nurturing aspect of myself these days.

My Mothering part who reminds you that your body is not betraying you, it’s simply asking you to become fully awake and support its journey better.

Who reminds you that rest is not a weakness, but instead is one of the most productive things you could ever engage in.

Who says you don’t need to justify your exhaustion, but instead learn how to protect your hard-earned energy to give to the things that truly bring meaning and joy to your life now!

The Mothering one who sits down with you in a quiet space and boldly says: “Let’s figure this out together. You’re not alone.”

I also want to honor how complex emotions can be on Mother’s Day.

Perhaps you’ve lost your Mother, or never had the relationship from her you desired or needed, or like me, you wanted to have children but couldn’t and ran out of time…

If this day feels more tender for you, I SEE YOU! But please don’t let that stop you from valuing the Mother in YOU!

Whether it’s a joyful or tender day on Mother’s Day, I invite you to reflect on who you have Mothered throughout your life.

Not solely children, but pets (like for me – cat and bird “kids” who LIGHT up my life every day), special friends, patients, clients, romantic partners, heart-centred projects, brilliant ideas, and communities you’re a part of.

You put LOVE into those spaces and isn’t that the true essence of Motherhood?

So, since you’ve read this far, please take this as a genuine invitation and permission to Mother yourself – don’t skip your lunch, prioritize your sleep routine, get some exercise outdoors, clean up your skincare routine, hug your favorite pets and people more…

Return to yourself so that in Mothering yourself, you can Mother others with more energy, joy and effectiveness.

Because the Truth is, all Mothers, whether of children or otherwise, are the loving heartbeat of well, everything! And trying to pour love from a vessel that’s cracked and draining without repairing the leak and continually keeping the vessel topped up, is painful and I promise, preventable.

If you would love some guidance and support learning to Mother yourself, do not hesitate to give me a call or become a valuable Member of my women’s community, The EASY YOUniversity. We all rise together when in community!

Happy Mother’s Day to the Mother in YOU!

Hugs,

Dr. Krista Coombs xx

Dr. Ac, IFMCP